Necronomicon

Necronomicon Simon 221pp.

Simon’s Necronomicon is a wonderful example of missing the point. After going back and reading it again for the first time since I bought it, I’m honestly a little embarrassed that I own it. This volume purports to be a translation of the original, totally real, Necronomicon referenced so often in Lovecraft’s writing. Of course, any requests to view the original manuscript must, as a matter of policy, be refused.

The text itself is, well, it’s uninspired. Simon manufactures a weak imitation of Sumerian ritual formulae in a poetry which feels like it is desperately trying to achieve a sense of musty, ancient, foreboding drama, but really just feels dull. Interspersed with the translations of the spells into English are a variety of charms in what is claimed to be ancient Sumerian. Not being a scholar, I can’t speak to their authenticity, but they feel real enough, kind of.

Setting aside the flaws in the writing itself, this book fails in a very critical way; I’ll let Lovecraft himself explain, “if anyone were to try to write the Necronomicon, it would disappoint all those who have shuddered at cryptic references to it.” This alleged Necronomicon falls into this exact problem. While some of Lovecraft’s otherworldly, shuddering horror pokes its head through the lines in the text, at no point does this book send the shivers down one’s spine in the way that the vague, fleeting references scattered throughout the Cthulhu mythos are able to do.

I’ll keep this review brief, because I don’t want to harp on about the book more and more. It wasn’t good. I won’t be keeping it. Go read the original Cthulhu stories.

Would I recommend Necronomicon? No.

Score: 1.3/5

Would I keep this on my bookshelf? No.

-Mr. Cheddar